Alcohol abuse, or
using street drugs |
in front of your children, or while you are supposed to be caring for them |
 |
| Dangerous driving |
with your wife of kids in the car. Not insisting
your kids sit in their car seat or wear safety
belts |
|
| Defensiveness |
Refusing to admit obvious mistakes, take
responsibility and make appropriate apologies |
|
| Denying reality |
to your wife or children. Lying, or pretending you didn't say or do what just happened. |
|
| Disappearing |
and not telling your wife where you are so she will worry or fear for you |
|
Doing all the talking, interrupting, or talking over |
Not allowing others to express themselves. They deserve approximately equal time and respectful listening. |
|
| Emotional abuse |
Do not act in explosive or helpless ways so that your children will feel they have to think for you, act for you and take care of you |
|
| Frightening |
your wife and kids that you will hurt or kill yourself |
|
| Going silent |
and refusing to discuss necessary matters |
|
| Haranguing |
Going on with excessive explanations and
forcing others to listen |
|
| Humiliating |
them by putting down their efforts, or by cruel, bizarre, degrading forms of discipline |
|
Intimidating, Menacing or Threatening |
possibly by describing violent acts verbally, or by brandishing a gun or knife, or keeping weapons out in the open where the inference is that they could be used. |
|
| Name-calling |
or use of adjectives such as stupid, idiotic |
|
| Not really watching |
your children when you are left in charge of them |
|
Not working, or supporting |
You have to do your best to provide for your family. You can't leave all of that to your wife, too. Even if you are discouraged, or have to take a menial job, do it |
|
| Rigidity |
Holding to extreme standards or definitions without flexibility or willingness to adjust |
|
| Sexual abuse |
Includes exposing your children to pornography, not being dressed in front of your kids, not closing the bathroom door when either they or you are using the bathroom.
Also, do not use seductive language, commenting on or leering at their private body parts. Do not use inappropriate touch—including hugs, back rubs, etc—for prolonged, unwanted contact with your child, or one of their friends who is visiting.
You must never gratify yourself sexually by touching your children! |
|
Violence |
No slapping, hitting, shoving, beating, punching, kicking, hair pulling, pinching or choking your wife, kids or pets. No physical violence! |
| (from Men Who Dominate Women Who Appease) |
